Friends, family and faithful dogs ease transition to home

| PHILIP A. DWYER THE BELLINGHAM HERALD

Career: District court administrator in King County for 20 years.

Family: Three children, one son who lives in Bellingham and two daughters who live in Alaska and Wisconsin.

Hobbies: “Writing, motorcycling, dogs, family. The usual, I suppose.” She shares her room in Fairhaven Estates with her dear companion, a 10-month old Chihuahua named Prince. She recently lost her last dog, another Chihuahua she had for 13 years.

“As much as I love my children, loving dogs has been the constant joy in my life.”

For fun: “I love movies. I have spent a lot of time with friends on the island.”

McCrary also spent six years as a hospice volunteer and then eight years as a long-term care ombudsman for the state of Washington, which involved investigating complaints at nursing homes.

Setbacks: For the last couple years, McCrary has been battling pancreatic cancer and now has liver cancer. After several unsuccessful surgeries, doctors told her to focus on enjoying the rest of her life.

More than a year later, she is doing well, but McCrary made the move to an assisted living center after she found herself having trouble tackling stairs. From her background as an ombudsman, she was familiar with a lot of assisted living centers in the area.

Before the move: McCrary had lived independently in a condo on Lummi Island. She says having the Life Alert service (an alarm worn around the neck that can call 911) allowed her to keep her independence longer than she had anticipated.

Criteria: “I looked for a place that would give me some independence,” McCrary says. “Here you can furnish it yourself, and not have to use institutional furniture. The staff is very caring without being overbearing.”

What she likes most: Along with finding the residents friendly and open, McCrary says the building is well cared for and welcoming. “It wasn’t long for me to say to the dog, ‘Let’s go home,’ while we were out walking,” McCrary says. “The room has become my home already.”

What surprised her: “When I came here, it was far more homey than I expected,” she says. “I expected it to be institutional, but it wasn’t.”

Most difficult adjustment: “Giving up my home.” McCrary still owns her condo, but will most likely get everything in order to sell it.

Making the transition: McCrary says her friends’ support made the move easier. “The fact that my friends showed up in droves and almost had to take tickets like at Baskin-Robbins helped,” she says. “They’ve all been wonderful.”

Making new friends: “I don’t do anything deliberately,” she says, when it comes to making new friends. “It just happens, and in no time at all, I have friends. The dog helps, along with smiling and asking how people are doing.”

Health watch: McCrary’s doctors work directly with the assisted living center, so the constant contact helps smooth out trips to the doctor or keeping up on medications.

Meals: “This has a very nice dining room,” McCrary says. “It is a comfortable setup in an almost ritzy-restaurant style. The food is very good with a lot of options, suitable for diabetics, too, which I have.”

Family support: “They are very attentive and phone a lot,” McCrary says. Her son and his wife coordinated her move to Fairhaven Estates and he has been designated with power of attorney on her affairs and accounts. She says he has stepped up to the role and done a wonderful job.

Advice for prospective residents: “I think there comes a point where people should consider (assisted living),” McCrary says. “It isn’t as bad as they fear, but they need to be sure wills are made and you do a really good survey of your finances. Because this is not cheap.”

She also suggests visiting ahead of time and observing the staff and how well you are treated.

Making the most of the situation: “If you go in and you’re depressed and grumpy, it will be a challenge.

“I went in smiling and making it personal. If you do that, I see how people open up to you.”

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